Joyous Lament | The Journey of Grief

Jessie Carter October 6, 2023

I’d never given the process of lamenting a lot of thought until it was taught to me at a debriefing retreat. It was during a sad time in my life. While we were all at various places around the world for Christmas break, my American coworker-friends and I got word that our school in Afghanistan was closing, and we couldn’t go there. We’d just lost a lot: our jobs, our homes, our friends, our students, our belongings, and our adopted country. We were heartbroken.

Some of us were already visiting family in the States. Others (like me) were visiting relatives in other countries for the holiday. I made my way back to the USA/Oregon for a couple weeks, with no idea of what to do next. The school network we worked for paid for us to attend a debriefing retreat in the northeast corner of the U.S. Thus most of us found our way from the corners of the world to a small lodge in snowy, rural Pennsylvania.

Honestly, we really didn’t pay much attention to the things the director of the debriefing program was trying to teach us. Our motivation was to be together in our grief. To see each other one more time before our lives all went separate ways. And to celebrate some things together, like the couples in our group who were getting married (we went ahead and held the bridal shower we would have had in Kabul for four of my friends if we’d stayed longer). But a couple things she taught us stuck out to me. Namely, how to lament.

It’s been several years, so I don’t have my notes anymore from that lesson or the lament that I wrote. I know it had four or five parts to it. Searching on the internet recently, I discovered that a lament can have anywhere from four to seven parts to it. The consensus seems to be at least these four:

Addressing God/Turning to God: a reversal of our tendency to retreat from Him in our pain
Complaint: talking candidly to God about what is wrong (with the world, with our own life, etc.)
Ask/Request: a prayer for deliverance, healing, or other need
Trust/Praise: a vow to trust Him, and/or declaring His faithfulness or other attributes (sometimes these are separate, with the declaration of trust coming before the request, and then praise for Him at the end).

Many Psalms follow this structure or a variation of it (the parts aren’t always in the same order), but Psalms 4 and 5 are easy ones to see it in.

I love the book of Lamentations and the lamenting Psalms because of all of this. God is powerful. God is holy. God is pure. But He condescends (in the old-fashioned sense of the word, not the haughty/judgy modern use of it) to listen to us complain. Even when we’re as whiny as a two-year-old. In my experience, as long as we aren’t disrespectful in our complaints, He considers them, no matter how angry and whiny they sound. Why? Because He loves us. Psalm 5 puts it this way: (verse 7) “But I, by Your great love, can come into Your house…” We can come into God’s own space and share our hearts with Him. He welcomes it.

Currently in my life, I have some small things to grieve. But mostly I find myself lamenting the state of the world, especially in places like Afghanistan. It breaks my heart. But when I pause from reading the news and turn to Him, talk to Him candidly about what I find wrong with the world, declare my trust in Him, ask Him to heal/deliver/etc., and praise Him for who He is, then my heart heals a little. Hopefully the world does, too. And there is joy in that.

The debriefing retreat was probably the last time that almost all of us were together, although in the summer many of us flew to the weddings that we’d held the group bridal shower for. The retreat was a time of grief. Of lamenting, communally and privately. But also of great joy. We ended the week with laughter (reminiscing about the crazy times, confessing to our security manager all the safety rules we’d broken in Kabul, etc.). This was a great release. We were still heartbroken, but that week started the healing process in us. During the months and years that followed, we were able to help many of our former students get into boarding schools around the world so they could continue their studies. This brought us joy, because our work of helping kids could continue in a way. And we were grateful for that answer to one of the petitions in our lament.

I pray that we all find joy and peace in this process.

About the Author

Jessie is a novice writer, with several books in various stages and a blog about travel and the journeys of women. She is very excited to be a part of the CitySalt blog team. She has been blessed by a few communities of Christian writers that have encouraged her dream. She lives with her sweet husband, Chris, their 5 funny kids, and 1 fluffy cat in Springfield. She loves hiking and other outdoor and indoor adventures with her family.

Joyous Lament | Singing the Blues

Terry Sheldon September 29, 2023

I’ve always been a blues music guy - that honest and soulful anthem of the nitty gritty, where life's grimy rubber meets the rocky road. It’s an absolute original American musical art form with direct roots to jazz, country and rock and roll. But even with those connections, it remains a unique music genre, in both style and verse. Born from slavery in the American South, it’s the song of struggle, stress and intense hardship.

My interest in the blues is more than liking a catchy musical style and emotionally connecting to the horrible curse we brought to our nation's collective soul. It's certainly both of those, but I've noticed a recurring theme. The bible’s book of Psalms reveals a similar poetic structure and emotional tone - a "cry for help in a day of trouble".

So can our laments be joyous? Should they be?

Voicing our complaints with song, verse or speech, even though negative, elevates our soul. There is no denying the popularity of blues music and all of its cousins. In ironic contradiction, the music and words encompass not just our life’s successes, but also its gut-wrenching struggles. “Where is God and why is he allowing this to happen?!” It’s a central question. Of all the mysteries of our God, I think the WHY of suffering is the hardest to comprehend, and leads us to questioning God’s character and his actions.

Woe is me ... And woe is us!

Suffering alone is torture. But it becomes therapy when shared. It feels good to talk it out, and “me too” empathy enhances community and strengthens its members. A blues song on a recording soothes a tired soul. But a lively blues concert on a warm summer night brings a real synergy to the crowd, reminding us that we are not alone.

But back to the why.

Yes it's a mystery, and a hard one to embrace. For some, it's a daily slog through the muck, and seemingly never-ending. And the why remains. Constant. As we search the heavens for an answer, it rarely comes right away. But over time, gems do emerge - patience, hope and ironically, an emerging connection with our Abba Father.

The result is, deep character!

There is a richness of spirit that only suffering provides. It's the big payoff for all the hard work, a surprising and deeply satisfying reward. And an abiding peace emerges, becoming a permanent character trait.

So the blue becomes as wide as the sky and as deep as the ocean. And our song itself changes within our hearts, from a self-centered complaint to authentic worship.

Romans 5:3-4 MSG
"There’s more to come: We continue to shout our praise even when we’re hemmed in with troubles, because we know how troubles can develop passionate patience in us, and how that patience in turn forges the tempered steel of virtue, keeping us alert for whatever God will do next."

About the Author

Terry is a man in constant motion to explore new horizons. He has a thirst for new places and faces, and a deep love for the natural world - with a weakness for waterfalls and sunsets. All of this venturing out helps to both ground and inspire him, because it opens him up to people, with their vast, collective array of experiences, outlooks and responses.

He finds all of this fascinating and sees that it has encouraged the growth of something crucial in his Christian development: empathy and compassion toward his brothers and sisters on this planet.

Joyous Lament | A Look into Joyous Lamenting

John Rice September 22, 2023

It seems to me we humans are practically geniuses when it comes to avoiding pain, sorrow or suffering. Some of us seek out drugs, alcohol, food or sex to avoid our pain and then run the risk of becoming addicted to our “drug of choice”.

But there are so many other, more subtle ways of avoiding pain that may go more easily unnoticed, until something in our lives breaks down and brings it all to our attention or to the attention of our friends and family. One of these things might be working to the point of neglecting everything else, a condition known as “workaholism”. One way might be buying things, a condition we could call “shopping therapy”. Another might be sports and games which we move toward whenever we have free time. And one very common way we try to avoid pain is by denying it altogether! This may be the most subtle of all our tactics. It’s a bit of a mental game we play which can pose as a very spiritual practice.

We Christians are especially good at this one. When we are hurting, we’ve learned to say “Oh, it’s nothing. I’m fine.” Quickly turning from the suffering or pain, we jump ahead to the declarations, “God is good! I have faith! I’m not really sick or hurt or grieving or lonely or angry, etc.”

It seems to me that while we certainly do want to claim God’s power to heal, His goodness and our faith in Him, we would do well to first acknowledge the truth of the matter and submit to what our bodies and souls are trying to tell us! My wife used to say, “Our bodies never lie.” I think she was so right about that. What is that tightness around our shoulders really about? What is that gnawing sensation in our stomachs really trying to tell us? Why am I sweating when it’s not hot out? Why do I look the other way when I see a troubling scene? The answer is not always obvious and sometimes we might not get an answer until after the fact, but at the very least we can tell God about it!

This is where some of God’s people can help us. The people who wrote the Psalms understood very well the importance of being honest with God. They understood that God was OK with our honesty. Didn’t Jesus say, “The truth will set us free?” I think one of my favorite examples of honesty in the Bible is from the writer of Lamentations 3:19-24:

I remember my affliction and my wandering, the bitterness and the gall. I well remember them and my soul is downcast within me.

Only then does the writer say:

Yet this I call to mind and therefore I have hope: Because of the Lord’s great love we are not consumed, for His compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is Your faithfulness. I say to myself, “The Lord is my portion; therefore I will wait for Him.”

This is such a good example to me of the importance of being open and honest with God, while still remembering His goodness, love, faithfulness and power to work in our lives. And the result of this is a kind of deep joy and peace. This is why we can call our troubles “joyous lamenting”.

One practice I’ve been taught for helping me not avoid my negative feelings is called the Welcoming Prayer. It’s simply that when we recognize fear, hurt, grief, anger or any hard or negative feeling, we don’t push it out of our consciousness and seek some kind of salve to dull it. Instead, we acknowledge it and then say “Welcome, grief! Welcome, anger! Welcome, hurt!” We welcome it into our deepest soul, where then God can deal with it and show us how best to deal with it.

I know this Welcoming Prayer sounds a bit crazy:), but try it! You may just find yourself experiencing the healthy joy of the Lord sooner than you would have thought. The power of the negative feeling is overwhelmed and diminished, but not denied, knowing that God is actively involved… and He knows best how to work in any situation. This opens wide the door for “joyous lament”!

About the Author

John lives in Pleasant Hill with his dog, Gunnar, and a multitude of guests who enjoy the peace and beauty of the Cascade foothills. With three children and three grandchildren all living in Oregon, he is continually blessed with their company and the good food that always accompanies their get-togethers!

Joyous Lament | The Beauty of Loss

Professor Popinjay/Chris Carter September 15, 2023

There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens: A time to be born and a time to die, a time to plant and a time to uproot, a time to kill and a time to heal, a time to tear down and a time to build, a time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to dance…

When the topic of lament came up as a possible theme for these blogs, my mind immediately went to this Ecclesiastes verse. There is a time for everything… even sadness. Then in 1 Corinthians 6:12, it says "All things are permissible for me" but not all things are helpful. "All things are permissible for me," but I will not be enslaved by anything.

Mark Twain said, "As an example to others, and not that I care for moderation myself, it has always been my rule never to smoke when asleep, and never to refrain while awake. I never smoke more than one cigar at a time"

Obviously moderation can be subjective, although Twain might be proof we're not always the best judge of what moderation means for ourselves. If there is a time for everything, some questions arise: When is it the right time for what? How long shall we go on in any of these activities? When is it time to change from one thing to another? How many cigars SHOULD we smoke at once?

I first consider guilt. Guilt is evidence of our conscience or the Spirit speaking to us but it can also be used by the enemy to prevent us from personal growth and positive influence. Hopefully guilt brings us to make good decisions for ourselves and be rid of what brought us guilt before we are in real trouble. But if guilt persists long after we are redeemed it becomes shame and shame can become debilitating to us. The fear of God is the BEGINNING of wisdom but God's Love cast out all fear. We should not remain in guilt indefinitely.

Likewise, we mourn the passing of loved ones but to remain in mourning forever is something even our passed loved ones would not wish on us. There was a time for mourning. That time passes. The time to move on arrives.

We can lament different kinds of things. We can lament our actions. We can lament certain happenings in the world. We can lament the loss of something dear to us. We can lament the loss of a relationship. This lament I know all too well.

I had spent twenty years lamenting the loss of a relationship. In my grief and anger I sought to change myself into something more befitting to what that relationship required despite the impossibility of mending it. I began to read more. I began to think about things differently. The changes I made were beneficial to me. But my motivation for making these changes was unhealthy and it was eating away at me.

More accurately I learned it was not the lament of loss that was continuing to affect me but rather a hatred of myself, or who I used to be. How could I have been so foolish to have lost something so dear to me? But hate benefits no one.

A counselor advised I need to have compassion for that twenty year old version of myself whom I came to despise so much. I knew this was a way of saying I need to forgive myself. But I should have known better back then, right? I held myself to such a high standard! And the disgust I had for that twenty year old me was what turned me into something I rather liked now… or had it? Perhaps in all ways but one. I needed to let go of that grief and hatred of myself to truly be free. I knew in the present I was still tormenting myself. The time to move on was long overdue.

It took much retrospection to realize that what I endured, the changes I had put myself through, and who I am now had been directed by God from the start. The relationship I had lost was not good for me then, and it would have only become worse if allowed to continue. The lifestyle changes, despite being improperly motivated at the time, prepared me not for fixing the past but for facing the future. And now I find myself aptly placed and prepared to love the people around me in the ways they need. I find myself blessed beyond anything that past life would have been able to yield had I stayed that course. This all starts with moving on and being able to love myself.

Yes, the twenty year old me was ignorant and foolish. But we all were at some point. The process of every activity under heaven, for which there is a time, are the processes of learning and growth. We cannot remain stagnant or "be enslaved" at any point in the process or we begin to die or neglect those in our charge, be they family or acquaintance. Growth moves forward and blossoms and multiplies.

As the Master sculpts you, do not lament for long the loss of the bits and pieces that are gradually chipped away. What remains becomes more and more beautiful with every bit removed.

About the Author

Christopher has worked as a children’s pastor and youth leader for several years and has published countless humor articles under the pseudonym Professor Popinjay. He studied biblical history and child psychology through Burean University and various other educational institutions. He enjoys writing, art, and the history of invention. He lives with his amazing wife Jessie and their six bizarre children, one of whom is a cat..

Joyous Lament | An Invitation to Honesty

Aaron Friesen September 8, 2023

Our New Blog Series, Joyous Lament

In 2003, I took a class on the Book of Psalms at Fuller Seminary. That class radically altered how I think about prayer and how I relate to God. The professor presented us with a typology for understanding different kinds of psalms, and it was in that context that I first learned about lament psalms. I learned that laments were the most common type of psalm in the Book of Psalms, and this was a shocking revelation for me. I had always thought about the Psalms as the place where Israel recorded David’s expressive songs of praise and thanksgiving to God. I had never stopped to reflect on or consider all the places in the Psalms where the writers were questioning God, venting to God about the things going wrong in their lives, or begging God to change their circumstances.

Implicitly and explicitly I had been taught that Christians should praise and thank God no matter what was going on in their lives or in the world. Over time, this belief had created an insurmountable barrier between myself and God when I experienced other feelings. When I was feeling far away from God or disappointed by my life circumstances or angry about the pain and suffering I saw going on in the world, I believed that I needed to change those feelings before I could approach God in prayer. This proved to be a difficult, if not impossible, task. So, I just didn’t pray much when I was feeling those things. If I did pray, it was full of apologies for my feelings and then long periods of waiting and hoping for my feelings to change. Needless to say, this cycle tanked my prayer life. It also led to perpetual feelings of guilt because I could not pray as I should.

When I learned that almost half of the 150 psalms in our Bibles are laments, I was floored. How could this be!? I remember reading through the whole Book of Psalms to verify that this was the case. It was true! What was going on? At first, I think I decided these laments must have just been a way that “Old Testament people” talked to God before Jesus came. Surely, it was out of place for Christians who follow Jesus to talk to God like this. Then I learned that Jesus prayed one of these lament psalms on the cross, and I started to consider that maybe there was something deeper going on with these lament psalms that I just didn’t understand.

During this time of discovery, I also read a book by Walter Brueggemann called The Message of the Psalms. In this book, Brueggemann made the case that the people of Israel were very wise when they wrote down and collected these particular psalms. He proposed that different types of psalms were written to help the people of Israel to communicate honestly with God at various stages in their journey, and that these experiences correspond to common experiences or places in which all human beings find themselves in their faith journeys: Orientation, Disorientation and Reorientation.

Praise Psalms: Orientation

The people of Israel used the praise psalms to give voice to their experiences of life going well or as it should. These psalms celebrate the fact that the promises of God are lining up with one’s own life experience. There is a sense of orientation or congruence between the commitments that God has made and the things that one is experiencing. In praise, one confesses God’s faithfulness and righteousness that is being known now and trusted for one’s future. When life is making sense, it is honest and natural for a person of faith to praise God for it.

Lament Psalms: Disorientation

But, inevitably, something will happen that disrupts these feelings of congruence – a friend gets desperately sick; a child gets bullied at school; a loved one goes through a terrible divorce; we get fired from a job that we love. These kinds of experiences surface deeper questions, and our faith can become disoriented. What is God up to? Why has this happened? Are God’s promises really true? Has my faith or trust been misplaced?

The lament psalms were Israel’s way of expressing these feelings of disorientation to God. Israel knew that to praise and thank God when one’s soul is in distress is fake. If one does not honestly express these feelings, it will inevitably lead to a shallow relationship with God. To lament is to trust the relationship enough to honestly express the disconnects that we experience (or feel that we experience) between God’s character and commitments and the details of our lives. Lament also makes space for God to respond and address the disconnects that we experience in a concrete way. That is why most lament psalms also contain a note of hope about the future. Based on past experiences, Israel had a legitimate hope that God would intervene once again and fix whatever had gone wrong.

Thanksgiving Psalms: Re-Orientation

It may take a long time for God to answer, but when God does finally answer it changes us. We grow in our faith. We become oriented back to God again, but we are never the same. Our experiences of lament become the sites where God proves to be a trustworthy savior and healer, and so we look back with thanksgiving. These experiences of God become a story of how God’s love has truly made a difference in our lives, and these stories of God’s love then become a collective testimony of God’s faithfulness that can be passed down to future generations.

This entire process of communication and growth in our relationship with God can be seen in its raw and naked form in the Psalms. Nothing has proven more helpful for me in my own prayer life than to allow the lament Psalms to become a model for my own communication with God when life gets hard. In prayer I now share honestly about what I’m feeling, no matter how ugly it is. I verbalize the questions that I’m wrestling with. I express my doubts and my anger for what seems like God’s absence or slowness. I let God know about the things that just aren’t adding up to me.

I can tell you, time and time again God has met me in my lament. God has comforted my broken heart. God has given clarity and focus to my scattered mind and thoughts. God has wept alongside me as I have wept. God has kicked my butt when I was whining way too much. God has corrected me for being too critical of others. God has intervened in desperate situations. In all these ways, God has been helping me to write my own unique song of thanksgiving with the same refrain as these beautiful and wise songs of old: “Weeping may endure for a night, but joy comes in the morning (Psalm 30:5).”

About the Author

Aaron is a passionate seeker of God and truth, and he enjoys encouraging others in their own pursuits of the same. He especially likes to think about how God is at work in the most ordinary and mundane aspects of our existence. He loves going on adventures to new places with his wife, Heather, and four kids and his perfect day would involve an excellent cup of coffee (or two!), a hike to somewhere beautiful and serene, and some good conversation over a pint at a warm pub. He currently serves as an adjunct instructor at Portland Seminary and co-leads the CitySalt Kids’ Ministry along with his wife, Heather.

The Joy of Being Human | Feeling Emotions

Mike Wilday September 1, 2023

One of the clearest markers of a person’s humanity is the ability to feel emotions. An initial search on ChatGPT requesting an exhaustive list of human emotions returned a list of over 106 different emotions, with the caveat that the list of emotions was only extensive and not exhaustive because emotions are “very nuanced and influenced by a wide range of factors.”

A cursory review of ChatGPT’s list will reveal many familiar emotions. Classic emotions like love, joy, anger, delight, guilt, shame, compassion, frustration, loneliness, hope, despair, and contentment can all be found on the list. Each emotion listed was varied and nuanced. Glee and happiness carry the same elation as the emotion of joy, but our experience of each reveals how nuanced and unique each is. Bitterness, contempt, and fury find their roots in anger but are also uniquely different, according to our experience.

Reviewing the list of emotions reminds me of Psalm 139:14. “Thank you for making me so wonderfully complex! Your workmanship is marvelous—how well I know it” (NLT). These emotions are a beautiful facet of the character and nature of God intricately expressed within each of us. Within humanity, he has intricately woven a myriad of the emotions that he experiences. God, in all his omnipotence and perfection, exhibits feelings and expresses himself throughout scripture.

Zephaniah 3:17 speaks of the Lord delighting in his people. Isaiah 62:5 refers to God’s rejoicing over his people, Israel. Psalm 147:11 speaks about God’s pleasure. Ephesians 4:30 speaks of God experiencing sorrow. Exodus 34:6-7 speaks of God experiencing compassion and mercy. Psalm 78:40 speaks of God’s grief. Mark 3:5 expresses the sadness of Jesus. And in John 2:13-17, we have a straightforward story of Jesus experiencing anger.

In many contexts, emotions carry a negative connotation. People have been wounded by and hurt by others who have allowed their emotions to lead them to act in sinful ways, thus marking certain emotions as “inappropriate” or “out of control” or, in some instances, even forbidden. In my experience, particularly during adolescence, anger became a taboo emotion. But today, I propose that how we respond and react to emotions is sinful, not the emotions themselves. If God, in all his perfection, righteously experiences the full gambit of emotions without sin, I think that we, too, can do the same (with his support). According to Galatians 5:16-26, our response to those emotions is what matters. When experiencing difficult emotions, we can choose to walk under the guidance of Holy Spirit and choose to behave righteously, or by our sinful nature and respond unrighteously.

Only as we walk in unity with God and his spirit will we truly experience the exuberance of our humanity as expressed in the entire range of emotions. With him, we can endure anger, sadness, grief, overwhelming joy, regret, sorrow, expectation, anxiety, loneliness, or whatever emotion we are most impacted by. Together with Christ, we can be fully human.

About the Author

Mike enjoys spending time with his wife and four kids. He loves Jesus, art, music, and poetry. He currently works as the Manager of Learning Technology Solutions for Los Angeles Pacific University and is passionate about adventuring outdoors.

The Joy of Being Human | Relax in Grace

Mollie Havens August 25, 2023

A big part of being a Christian is to just enjoy being a child of God and know that you are saved. You are not saved because of anything you’ve done but because of grace. Ephesians 2:8-9 says, “For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith, and this is not from yourselves, it is the gift of God, not by works so that no one can boast.” Because of this we can relax in Christ. This does not mean that we do not try to be a good person, it just means that we do not have to be perfect.

For me it is hard to not try and be perfect. If you ever heard of the Enneagram, then you will know that the “achievers’ (Type 3) try very hard to be perfect and won’t be satisfied with anything less. Because of this, they can be workaholics and dedicated to doing things right. I often feel defined by my achievements. I am goal oriented and can find my worth in my accomplishments. I am driven and find it hard to relax. I have a difficult time napping and turning my mind off. I have a type A mentality and a strong drive for self improvement. I have a fear of failure and not measuring up. Because of this, I have a hard time accepting that God's grace is enough. I try to earn my salvation and be as good as I can be, instead I need to learn how to lie back into the arms of grace and know his love enough.

But just because we have grace does not mean we can slack off. James 2 talks about how faith is alone is not enough. It needs to produce good deeds. If it doesn’t, then it is dead and useless. So we need to find the right balance of doing what is right and basking in the grace of God. And on this journey, we can also remember that there is nothing we could ever do to make God stop loving us. We need to find that right balance of being good for the right reasons, not to earn God’s love or salvation but to be the person God inspires us to be, a person after God's own heart.

In Romans 8:29-30 Paul explains that “those whom He foreknew [and loved and chose beforehand], He also predestined to be conformed to the image of His Son [and ultimately share in His complete sanctification], so that He would be the firstborn [the most beloved and honored] among many believers. 30 And those whom He predestined, He also called; and those whom He called, He also justified [declared free of the guilt of sin]; and those whom He justified, He also glorified [raising them to a heavenly dignity].” It is tempting to get so caught up in the fact that God calls us to a great purpose that we forget that he has justified us and glorified us. He has sanctified us, saved us and given us salvation before we even discover our calling. As soon as we believe in Him, he gives us grace which grants us the power to find that purpose he has called us to. So work hard at that purpose that God has destined you for but don’t forget to relax in His gift of love, peace, joy, hope and grace that he lavishly bestows on his children.

About the Author

Mollie is recently married to her wonderful husband Dustin. She is a Wound Care RN at McKenzie Willamette Hospital. She enjoys being creative, getting outdoors and spending time with friends and family.

The Joy of Being Human | Embrace the Change! Transformation is a gift!

Sara Gore August 18, 2023

Years ago, I attended a poetry reading at my local Christian Bookstore. During a lull between readers, a kind-looking, elderly woman walked up to the microphone. She was slender and small in stature with white hair. As she stood silently before our small group, she shared a smile that warmly beamed and radiated such peace and assurance to all in attendance.

She introduced her poem as a story that described two dear friends meeting in a restaurant for a coffee date. Her poem began with the words “A table for two in a quiet corner…,” and continued with descriptions of deeply encouraging, and life-affirming conversation. She read the words, “I’m alone but never lonely,” then revealed her dear friend was Christ.

I deduced she was possibly widowed as I discerned she exuded a peace mixed with the bittersweet pang of loss. Her poem was accented with a firm resolve in her convictions and faith in Christ. She concluded her poem with a confirmation that she completely trusted God’s plan for her life. And also stated that Jesus’ presence filled her life to overflowing with an abiding joy, regardless of circumstances.

I recall being sincerely touched by her deep love relationship with Jesus. I admired the hard choices and periods of suffering she must have known to have such a strong faith and close connection with Christ. And I strongly hoped I could have that too, one day.

This recollection reminds me of the wonderful quote from the author Elisabeth Kübler-Ross:

“The most beautiful people we have known are those who have known defeat, known suffering, known struggle, known loss, and have found their way out of the depths. These persons have an appreciation, a sensitivity, and an understanding of life that fills them with compassion, gentleness, and a loving concern. Beautiful people do not just happen.”

After my parents died, along with several members of my extended family, I felt so changed and disoriented by the concentrated amount of loss in my life. In a space of 9 years, I lost at least one family member or close friend almost every year. I certainly did not look or feel beautiful, but I felt the fire of sorrow burn away parts of me, leaving the hollow space for God to reconstruct and refill.

This sculpting process was never comfortable, but I stubbornly chose to trust Christ to help me survive, somehow. I urgently needed new spiritual and practical life skills, habits, and routines to help me to live in this new environment. With so many of the people I depended on for emotional support gone, I didn’t know how to get started. I didn’t know what action to take, but to surrender.

This is the beauty of transformation! Christ led me on a path of His own design that involves maturing from one new version of myself to the next. With time, I felt more at peace and safer when I realized that Jesus had given me a protected amount of unrushed time with Him, and a private place in my spirit to process all the changed circumstances.

I made plenty of mistakes, but Christ in His divine mercy would never fire me from His plan, or discard me from His kingdom. That realization helped me to breathe deeply again, and start to shed the anxieties that plagued me. I know my life is not a job with anxiety inducing performance reviews. My life, even with the chaos, is a privilege. It’s a privilege to try, fail, fail again and again without Christ giving up on me. As long as I stay partnered with Jesus, I succeed according to His standards. Especially when he wants me to partner with Him in my own spiritual growth! This is wonderful news for me, but does not alter the fact that life still includes the hard work of allowing yourself to be changed!

James 5:13 NLT

“Are any of you suffering hardships? You should pray.

Are any of you happy? You should sing praises.”

This is why my private times spent in God’s presence are so important. Jesus’s presence transforms me and re-sets my compass to my True North which is Christ’s death and resurrection, and His word!

Since the poetry reading to the present day, my daily experiences continue to deepen my desire for more of Christ in my life. I feel I am slowly becoming someone with a heart filled with more empathy, and with a stronger motivation to reach out to others. I remember the kind lady’s quiet, knowing smile and I feel such a kinship with what I perceived she was feeling. I know better than to compare myself with that wise woman, but I realize what I am experiencing is the priceless gift of transformation.

I have the great privilege to learn, improve, and mature as I focus on Jesus’s unconditional love and tune out earthly condemnation. And I firmly believe Christ has this planned for all of us. Redeeming transformation! This is one of my favorite aspects of being human. Christ has glorious plans for our spiritual growth, and dearly wants His children to experience more of the life he originally created for us all!

Hebrews 13:20-21 NLT

“Now may the God of peace –

who brought up from the dead our dear Lord Jesus,

the great Shepherd of the sheep,

and ratified an eternal covenant with his blood –

may he equip you with all you need for doing His will.

May He produce in you, through the power of Jesus Christ,

every good thing that is pleasing to Him.

All glory to Him forever and ever! Amen.

About the Author

Sara has attended CitySalt Church since 2004, the year it was founded. She studied Journalism, wrote for her college newspaper, and is a member of Oregon Christian Writers. Sara also enjoys singing hymns with friends: “there is a sermon in every hymn waiting to be discovered and enjoyed.”

The Joy of Being Human | Feasting and Fellowship

Jessie Carter August 11, 2023

What is your favorite food? Favorite restaurant? Favorite memory of a special meal? What makes it special?

We humans aren’t the only animals on the planet to love food. But the way we enjoy it is something that I believe is a uniquely human experience.

Of course, we don’t just gather/kill our food and start eating it. Aside from fruits and some veggies, it usually needs to be cooked, after all. But we don’t stop there. We marinate it, season it with spices, and layer it with other combinations of foods to bring out the best flavors.

We savor it.

But although that may separate us from most animals, the experience doesn’t stop there. We like to eat in community. Sure, many animals eat together, too. But when I was growing up, I don’t think our cat Molly ever said to the other cats, “Hey, Zorro! Angel! Abby Tabby! Our humans just filled our bowl! Come and eat with me so I don’t have to eat alone.” No, they all came and ate when they could because they were hungry and didn’t want to miss out. Whereas we humans will often wait for each person to get their food before we dive in. We invite each other over for dinner, go out to fun restaurants, pig out at special events and holidays, pass the popcorn back and forth during a movie, and eat s’mores around a campfire.

Why do we do this?

Because there’s something special about eating together. It bonds us together for some reason. Maybe it’s the conversation. Maybe it’s sharing the experience of delicious food, or a special time or place (like a holiday or wedding). Maybe it’s because as our belly is filled, so is our soul.

Whatever the explanation, Jesus seemed to know that community is formed around food. When thousands gathered to listen to him speak, He didn’t just fulfill their physical need for nourishment. They experienced a miracle together. I imagine that in the days of the early church, some believers would say to each other things like “Hey, were you there the day Jesus fed all of us from some kid’s lunch?” “Yeah, that was amazing! God can do anything!” And this would bond them together even more.

The night before His death, He shared a meal with His disciples. He poured out His heart to them, saying “This is my body, broken for you,” and “This is my blood, poured out for you.” They caught a glimpse of how much He loved them. In the days of the early church after His resurrection and ascension, they made this experience a tradition. The new believers and disciples would bond regularly over remembering His sacrifice. They would share His love with each other and nourish their souls.

We still do this today, over 2,000 years later. We take communion in church. We feast with potlucks before or after church. And we get together for meals (or ice cream!) during the week.

We form community. Relationships. Bonds that are strengthened over time, or break our hearts when they’re broken. We experience His love through each other.

Amen! Now let’s eat!

About the Author

The Joy of Being Human | A Holy Human Triangle

John Rice August 4, 2023

An older, wiser man once told me that for a human to be healthy, happy and whole, he or she needed to exercise a triangle of work, rest and play. Interestingly, as I reflected on my personality and habits at the time, I was pretty decent at work, so-so at rest and terrible at play! I was told more than once during those days that I was a serious soul that needed to lighten up!

Looking back at the wise man’s words, I really appreciate the emphasis that he put on the balance of work, rest and play. Too much of one or two of those made for a wobbly life that could very easily lead to some kind of breakdown. Believe it or not, trying to introduce more play into my life was a bit awkward and intimidating. It was like a foreign concept. I still avoid board games like the plague (very weird, I know). I think it’s because I feel caught, just sitting there doing nothing productive. But I did learn to develop some other, more physical activities of play like swimming, paddle boarding, tennis, cycling. Sometimes I can even enjoy playing cards, chess or backgammon. What a breakthrough!

I wonder if Jesus lived a life with this healthy triangle. Certainly we know he worked. Think of all that teaching, healing, and casting out of demons. He seemed to know how to rest by going out “backpacking” on mountains alone to be with God. But did he play? There are not too many examples of him playing that I can think of, but we can surmise from his love and inclusion of children, that he knew how to play. I have also seen some movie interpretations of his life where he is occasionally very playful with his mother and friends. I can imagine those interpretations hit close to home! His interactions with the more legalistic Pharisees have the background message, “Lighten up! Enjoy being human! Laws were made for the benefit of mankind, not simply to trap him into rules, duties and obligations which often lead to either pride (for being good at them) or guilt (for being bad at them).”

Jesus went to weddings. He went to dinner parties. He appreciated and commented on the beauty of nature, of the goodness of Creation. I can imagine he was a person we would really enjoy hanging out with. He is our friend after all. If he noticed us getting too “religious,” he might even encourage us to “lighten up” and enjoy life a bit more!

The prophet Nehemiah wrote, “Go and enjoy choice food and sweet drinks, and send some to those who have nothing prepared. This day is holy to the Lord. Do not grieve, for the JOY of the Lord is our strength!” Nehemiah 8:10

Do you work? Do you rest? Do you play? Do you need to “lighten up?” Is there a balance of these things in your life? Maybe you can think of other things that are helpful to live a healthy, happy and whole life! It seems so easy to focus on the negative things of life, the suffering, the hurt, the injustice. How might our lives be different if we focused on the joy of being human, the appreciation of this amazing planet we live on, loved by God and by other people…with opportunities to love them back!

About the Author

The Joy of Being Human | Enjoy It While It Lasts

Kayla Erickson July 21, 2023

Well, I’ve gone full summer mode and have been swimming, sitting in the shade, and eating delicious food with people I love at a dizzying rate. It’s really been at the expense of some work that I was hoping to have done by now. But when the warm air is blowing over your bare arms and the sunlight is filtering gently through the leaves overhead, it’s terribly hard to go back inside and do computery things. On top of that, I’m feeling quite nostalgic this year. My kids are at that fun age where they can do more things, and you don’t have to watch them every second lest they perish. And the air is so clear and warm.

I’m sure I’m not alone in this, but I’ve developed a bit of anxiety about summer- particularly about the fact that it may need to be renamed entirely as “fire season.”

Perhaps you’ve heard of the seasons of Oregon:

Winter
Fool’s Spring
Second Winter
Spring of Deception
Third Winter
Mud Season
Actual Spring
Summer
False Fall
Second Summer (1 week)
Actual Fall

Let me tell you, with all the seasons on that list that make it hard to get outside, it would be a real shame to take out Summer and replace it with Fire Season.

Sometimes in the midst of the enjoyment, I feel a tinge of anxiety about the inevitable time when smoke will cloud the sky again. This simple sweetness of summer could disappear in a moment. So how do I fully appreciate the beauty of this gift of God? How do I keep the bitterness of fear out of this moment of happiness?

I think it has to do with abiding- living life fully aware that God is with us and we are with God. When we feel that we can trust God to abide with us through the hard times that will surely come, it brings freedom to savor the good times as well. Paul said, “I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do everything through him who gives me strength” (Philippians 4:12-13).

I don’t have to deny the likelihood that there will be wildfires before fall. But they are not burning now. Here and now, the sky is clear. The water is refreshing. The popsicles are cold and drippy. Just as it would be fitting to feel grief and lament in the face of loss, it is also fitting to feel joy in the face of abundance. So yes, I will feel disappointed when the smoke comes. But God will be there.

Today, I feel happy, and God is here.

(Sidenote: While I am exploring my feelings around this lighthearted if sincere subject, know that I am aware that others may be going through things much more burdensome and perilous. I fully believe that God is faithful to abide with us through all things, large or small, but I want to acknowledge the difficulty of trusting God through such times, and do not intend to diminish this.)

Romans 12:15
“Rejoice with those who rejoice; weep with those who weep.”

Matthew 6:31-34
“Therefore do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ For the Gentiles strive after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things will be added unto you. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Today has enough trouble of its own.”

James 1:17
“Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows.”

Psalm 145:17-19
“The Lord is righteous in all his ways
And loving toward all he has made.
The Lord is near to all who call on him,
To all who call on him in truth.
He fulfills the desires of those who fear him;
He hears their cry and saves them.”

About the Author

Kayla is is 37. She has been married to her husband, Joel, for 17 years and she homeschools their two energetic boys. She loves stories, being out in nature, meeting interesting people, and seeing others grow in their freedom in Christ.

The Joy of Being Human | Have You Ever Had to Make Up Your Mind?

Professor Popinjay/Chris Carter July 14, 2023

To help me verbally process some thoughts, a counselor suggested I utilize an app that simulated conversation known as a chat bot.

The program was effective and amazingly it really seemed like I was talking to an actual person! It didn’t take long for the illusion to unravel though. It wasn’t genuinely reciprocating, it was just programmed to be agreeable. It was a useful tool but it hardly sufficed for a stimulating conversation.

I used to ask my Dad why God didn't just make people love Him. “Because God doesn’t want to be loved by a bunch of robots” was my dad’s pithy response.

Another question I asked was “where did God come from?” Again my dad’s reply was simple but true. “He’s just always been.” I pondered these notions well into adulthood and it led me to great thinkers such as Descartes and Einstein. One considered the attributes of God and man in a very logical way and the other looked at the attributes of eternity in a mathematical way. I hope you will permit me to delve into the metaphysical for just a moment so that I may explain where my Joy in my own humanity originates.

The opposite of Eternity is nothing. As we are able to perceive the order of matter around us, our limitations, and our existence as we pass through time, it naturally follows that something has to exist unbound by limitations, timeless, and omniscient. Perfect wisdom implies perfect love. And love is not self-seeking. Love must manifest and be expressed. In this we find our existence and with it we are given the most wonderful and terrible tool; the reason I find my deepest sorrow intertwined with my greatest joy in my humanity.

With the gift of our free will, through one arrogant act, we brought sin and death into this world! How can it even be called a gift? We abused the privilege afforded by this gift and have used it to separate ourselves from God’s perfect holiness. How could an omniscient perfectly wise God trust us with such a destructive tool?

In Noah’s time our evil choices had grieved God. It’s written in Jeremiah’s time that we created forms of evil that had not even entered God’s mind. We truly are free to make terrible choices and to inflict the results of those choices on ourselves and each other, in full spite of the consequences both eternal and temporal.

But as with all tools, our free will can be used to create as well as destroy.

It's said if you can think three moves ahead in the game of chess you are a very good chess player. Chess champions have claimed to think as far as five moves ahead. Suppose you could think an infinite number of moves ahead and had an infinite amount of time to deliberate. Would you ever make a mistake again?

In the film Groundhog’s Day, Bill Murray is forced to relive the same day over and over again. For a while, he manipulates the various events of that day to his own selfish ends. He begins to realize however that these selfish endeavors are unfulfilling and would always end in complete disaster. Eventually he begins to manipulate the events of the day to work out to the betterment of everyone around him.

What action by Timeless Omniscient God could be more selfless and perfect than creating life and granting it the ability to ultimately reject him?

He knew all too well we would! He knew all too well the pain He would have to endure to reconcile us to Him and yet He created us anyway! Our very existence has come out of sacrificial Love, our ability to choose was given to us out of sacrificial Love, and it’s God’s sacrificial Love that finally enables reconnection with Him.

And beautifully still left in our hands is choice.

We’re not preprogrammed chatbots designed to be agreeable. When we choose to love, when we choose to turn to God, it is real. Free will is the ability to love with real love. We may not be able to bring things into existence and breathe life into them but we have been given the ability to manifest real love!

But what of the results of our terrible choices? What of the sin and death we have filled this world with?

In order for our free will to work, it is dependent on our limitations including our brief trek through time. We do not think an infinite number of moves ahead. Of course the choice to accept God’s gift of His sacrifice is before us from day one and those who can “believe without seeing” are blessed but most of us must learn the hard way. Thankfully God is not a helicopter parent protecting us from everything as we galavant blissfully unaware of the perils around us. We are allowed to see and feel the effects of sin and death. We are invited not simply to believe but to gradually know and understand God’s gift. Would this knowledge be as meaningful if it was preprogrammed into us? So our choice to accept God’s sacrificial Love is not only real, but understood better and better by us over time.

And when His Love is accepted, the dark colors of our selfish choices will each be used as a brush stroke to bring out His Light in the Masterpiece that is each and everyone of us. No longer do they tarnish as a stain or mark against us. Rather every tragedy, every sin, every harsh word, every sorrow is the beginning of another story of His victory in us. While we must each in our own time endure the sin and death of this world until all time ends, rejoice, for Eternal God who exists beyond time has already conquered sin and death and said with finality “It is finished!”

By my choice I have permeated myself with sin. I have willfully brought death upon myself. I have involuntarily suffered crippling tragedy by time and chance. I have been blessed beyond my imagination.

The ultimate Joy I derive from my humanity?

My God-given ability, in spite of all my failures and tragedies and fortunes, to choose His Love… and to understand very well why I make that choice.

About the Author

The Joy of Being Human | God in the Strawberry Fields

Aaron Friesen June 30, 2023

Our New Blog Series, The Joy of Being Human

“Then God saw everything that He had made, and indeed it was very good.” Genesis 1:31. Is there joy to be had in embracing our humanness? God calls His creation “very good” and we are created in His image. (Genesis 1:27). Join the blog team every week as each member brings you their unique perspective on the often simple joys to be had in being made human.

With jobs in education and four kids in school, our family very much looks forward to summer break. Our first family outing of the summer was picking strawberries at a local farm. To me, it is one of the most wonderful and joyous experiences to stand in a field of green and savor the sweetness of that first fresh-picked strawberry of the season. With each bite, I am full of thankfulness and joy and awe that I am able to enjoy such a simple pleasure in life.

I believe that being fully present in my enjoyment, appreciation, and gratitude for a moment like this is a sincere act of worship that pleases the heart of God. Unfortunately, it is a fairly new idea for me that such an experience could be as much an act of worship as reading my Bible or praying or listening to a sermon. For much of my life, I thought of my spirituality and connection with God as having to do with more “churchy” activities while my day-to-day activities as a human were just things to do in between the more important spiritual things. It’s been a long journey for me to realize that the whole gamut of human experience ought to be entered into as an act of loving worship directed to the God who created it all.

Jesus said that one of the two most important commands or rules that we can focus on in life is to love our neighbor as our self. One way of looking at the “as our self” part of this command is that a proper love of our neighbor is inherently connected to a proper love of ourselves. I think that loving ourselves properly (as God has created us) must include embracing and celebrating our humanity. The first pronouncement that God speaks over humanity in the Bible is that they are good. Very good (Genesis 1:31)! That means, from God’s vantage point, there is deep goodness and beauty to be celebrated in the reality of our humanness, and that goodness surely extends to the most elemental aspects of our existence as human beings.

No doubt, there is much sin and brokenness present in the world, and human beings often reflect and participate in these realities. In many ways, human beings have a tendency to work against the very goodness that God has created in the world and in them, but this does not negate the essential goodness of human life as God has designed it to function.

I think it is fascinating to read the creation stories in the Bible and think about all the aspects of human life that are present before there is any mention of sin or “the fall.”

There was sex to be enjoyed. (Genesis 1:28)
There were amazing smells to savor. (Genesis 2:12)
There were all kinds of yummy food to eat. (Genesis 1:29-30, 2:9)
There was beauty to behold. (Genesis 2:9)
There were rhythms of work and rest to observe. (Genesis 2:2, 15)
There was relational partnership and intimacy to experience. (Genesis 2:20, 24)
There was open-ended creativity to perform. (Genesis 2:19-20)

Each of these parts of our humanity can be avenues of great joy and pleasure. It has been a good exercise for me to reflect on each one of these aspects of our common humanity and what it means that God designed human life in this way. Our faith in God, the creator and designer of it all, should draw us more deeply and authentically into these joyful and pleasurable experiences of human life.

For Christians, God’s salvation is not a salvation or deliverance from our humanity, but a salvation that we enter into and experience in and through our humanity. In fact, early Christians went to great and costly lengths to defend this truth. Jesus provides a path for us not to escape our bodies into some spiritual disembodied existence, but a path to become integrated, whole, and flourishing in our humanity. That is one of the main points of the incarnation of Christ.

The Jesus we read about in the Gospels didn’t just pray prayers, preach sermons, heal people, and cast out demons. In fact, most of his thirty-three or so years on earth were spent doing other things. He fully participated in the most common and basic joys and struggles of human life. In the background of the wonderous miracles and teachings of Jesus that we read about in the Bible are simple, unpretentious, down to earth human activities. God embraced humanity by becoming one. Jesus embraced his own humanity by entering fully into the human experience with all its joys and sorrows, capacities and limitations:

Jesus washed feet. (John 13:5)
Jesus cooked breakfast. (John 20:9)
Jesus started fires (John 20:9).
Jesus sung songs. (Mark 14:26)
Jesus went to parties. (John 2:1-3)
Jesus slept on the ground. (Matthew 8:20)
Jesus hiked up mountains (Matthew 17:1)
Jesus worked with wood. (Mark 6:3)

In all these activities, Jesus was fully experiencing life as a human being and God was demonstrating to us all what it looks like to live joyfully and freely as a human being in the world that God created.

Although it is easy to focus on the negative side of all the limitations that we experience as human beings, these limitations also provide the context for great art and creativity to emerge. Pastor Erwin McManus writes about the fact that art always comes into existence through a medium that has certain limitations and boundaries. He then applies this principle to humanity: “We are a work of art, and the limitations that often lead us to conclude that we’re only human should move us to celebrate that we are in fact incredibly human… You are God’s preferred medium to express himself and reveal himself.”(1)

So, with that in mind, go enjoy a piece of shortcake with fresh picked strawberries and whipped cream on top knowing that you are somehow expressing and sharing in the goodness and joy of God the master artist.

Erwin Raphael McManus, The Artisan Soul: Crafting Your Life into a Work of Art (New York: HarperCollins, 2014), 161.

About the Author

In His Image | In The Image of God He Created Them

Mike Wilday June 23, 2023

I’ve been considering this thought for several months now. What does it mean to be created in the image of God? And if the whole of humanity bears some aspect of his image, how am I then to live accordingly with others? My time of reflection left me considering the words of Paul to the Jewish believers in Rome from Romans 12:9-21 (NLT). He communicates in verses 9 and 10: “Don’t just pretend to love others. Really love them. Hate what is wrong. Hold tightly to what is good. Love each other with genuine affection, and take delight in honoring each other.”

A few verses later, he drops a massive bomb on persecuted believers: “Bless those who persecute you. Don’t curse them; pray that God will bless them” (Romans 12:14, NLT).

And then he extends it even more, a few verses later: “Never pay back evil with more evil. Do things in such a way that everyone can see you are honorable. Do all that you can to live in peace with everyone. Dear friends, never take revenge. Leave that to the righteous anger of God” (Romans 12:17-19, NLT).

The concept that every person is created in the image of God inspires me to consider how I am to live in alignment with others. If in each of us, there’s some aspect of God’s image; then I should carefully consider how I think about, talk about, engage with, and participate with all of the bearers of his image. This idea convicts my spirit to the core. How I perceive others must be impacted by this truth.

I believe this truth is echoed in all of scripture and reverberates in each author’s writing. Repeatedly scripture beckons us to embrace each other in love with kindness and consideration, and to think of others highly. In the age of justified evil, I am impacted by the apostles’ response to persecution. Did those who walked in that day perceive the value of each individual? Paul’s expression towards opposition in 1 Corinthians 4:12-13 requires some consideration. “… We bless those who curse us. We are patient with those who abuse us. We appeal gently when evil things are said about us.“

These responses must come from an awareness and consideration that God cares deeply for every individual - even those who do not follow in his ways. I want to have that same awareness and let go of all judgment, accusation, and evil thoughts to fully care about the truth that God has imparted part of himself to all creation, and just because a person, or people group, doesn’t follow his leadership, doesn’t mean that the Holy Spirit won’t convict them of their sin, or convict them of righteousness (John 16:8). Lord, help us all to see others as you do. Father. give us a spirit of prayer and of deep conviction when we engage with your creation.

About the Author

In His Image | Reject the Orphan Lie!

Sara Gore June 16, 2023

I am reading a book series titled “The Abba Journey” with some friends from church. Abba is the word used for father by Jesus and Paul in the New Testament. The first pages of the first book cover the role of human fathers from different cultures throughout history.

Roman fathers focused on authority, and Hebrew fathers focused on relationship. The book next covers the concept of sonship in the eyes of our loving Heavenly Father, as taught by Jesus in the Gospels.

To quote the husband and wife authors, Kerry and Chiqui Wood, “Sons live in an atmosphere of love. Sons know who their father is, they know they have a home, and know they have an inheritance.”

To paraphrase two points from the books, sons and daughters also have a spirit of belonging; a sense of being connected to home no matter how far away they may travel. And one of the many priceless gifts we receive from the Father God is the freedom of knowing we are loved unconditionally. We don’t have to do anything to be accepted and approved.

I was very fortunate. I had two parents who loved me, fed and clothed me, were involved in the process of my education, and worked hard to keep me safe and sound.

Although I was physically healthy and did well in school, my emotional state was another matter. A thread of narcissism ran through the psyche of a prominent person in my family of origin.

For that person to feel secure, he/she had to always be right. And for that person to be right, everyone else had to be wrong. Narcissists tell the people they associate with, often and in great detail, when and how thoroughly they are wrong. It makes them feel better about themselves.

This leads us to the other side of the sonship coin …the orphan lie. I quote from the second book in the series, “Orphans live in an atmosphere of fear and bondage. They do not know who their father is. They feel they must achieve, perform, and prove themselves to be accepted.”

“They feel they must earn their way into a family. They don’t know whether they have an inheritance. And since they think they don’t have an inheritance, they feel they must claw and grab for everything they can get.”

These statements deeply resonated with my personal type of orphan thinking. And until I read them, I hadn’t fully realized that I had lived a large portion of my emotional life as an orphan!

Although I had accepted Christ into my life and knew I was a child of God, I had some urgent unfinished business from my childhood. I realized I had believed a damaging lie. As a child, I assumed the almost constant anger of that one family member was my fault. And it was an easy assumption to make. When this person announced yet again, I said or did something incorrectly, they were annoyed or angry with me. Then I transferred that lie to how I thought God saw me. Subconsciously I thought my defect of being chronically wrong would make God angry also, so I emotionally kept my distance from God. And when I sometimes couldn’t feel God near me, I subconsciously thought I was receiving the silent treatment for falling short of God’s standards. This technique was standard procedure in my family.

A major house-cleaning was needed immediately. I was very motivated to pull out the lies about my identity from my thoughts, by the figurative root. And to persistently plant God’s truths from His word in my mind, about His character and about who I am in His family. I began to earnestly work at consciously receiving God’s unconditional love like medicine, and to purposely invite His presence into my thoughts as a conversation. So many pieces began to fall into place.

I re-read the Parable of the Prodigal Son. The second book in the Abba Journey series points out the orphan thinking of the prodigal in Luke 15: 17-19:

“When he finally came to his senses, He said to himself, ‘At home even the hired servants have food enough to spare, and here I am dying of hunger! I will go home to my father and say, “Father, I have sinned against both heaven and you, and am no longer worthy of being called your son. Please take me on as a hired servant.”’

It then highlights the truth of his father’s incredible love and forgiveness in Luke 15:20, & 22-23:

“So he returned home to his father. And while he was still a long way off, his father saw him coming. Filled with love and compassion, he ran to his son, embraced him, and kissed him. His Father said to the servants ‘Quick! Bring the finest robe in the house and put it on him. Get a ring for his finger and sandals for his feet. And kill the calf we have been fattening. We must celebrate with a feast, for this son of mine was dead and has now returned to life. He was lost, but now is found.’ So the party began.”

The book also points out the orphan thinking of the older son in Luke 15:28-30:

“The older brother was angry and wouldn’t go in. His father came out and begged him, but he replied, ‘All these years I’ve slaved for you and never once refused to do a single thing you told me to. And in all that time you never gave me even one young goat for a feast with my friends. Yet when this son of yours comes back after squandering your money on prostitutes, you celebrate by killing the fattened calf!’

And once again includes the truth of his father’s incredible love and faithfulness for him in Luke 15:31-32:

“His father said to him, ‘Look, dear son, you have always stayed by me, and everything I have is yours. We had to celebrate this happy day. For your brother was dead and has come back to life! He was lost, but now he is found!’”

I am so thankful that life lived in partnership with our Heavenly Father, Jesus the Son, and the Holy Spirit is so very much better than we expect! And I speak from experience.

About the Author

In His Image | Artist to Artist

Jessie Carter June 9, 2023

Do you feel like a creative person? Did you know that everyone is creative? Yes, it’s true! I didn’t used to believe it, but I do now. And it even honors God when we exercise our creativity! Hear me out.

I’ve written about this idea before here in the Salt Blog, but it’s been four years, so I’m excited to revisit it and unpack it some more. In her book The Artist’s Way: A Spiritual Path to Higher Creativity, Julia Cameron taught me a spiritual principle that changed the way I see the world. It’s not a Christian book per se, but she does quote the Bible in it, and I don’t think she’s wrong in this regard.

Points 4 and 5 of her ten “Basic Principles” sum it up like this:

4. We are, ourselves, creations. And we, in turn, are meant to continue creativity by being creative ourselves.
5. Creativity is God’s gift to us. Using our creativity is our gift back to God.

As I read her book, I realized that if God created us, then He must be creative. Just look at His amazing artistry all around the world! There are thousands of waterfalls in the world, and no two of them look exactly alike. There are billions of people in the world, but all so different and beautiful! Even twins have differences that display His creativity.

And if God created us in His image like the Bible says (see Genesis 1:27), then chances are, He made us creative, too. Sure, He didn’t make us exactly like Him. We are not omnipotent, omniscient, etc. But as I look at the amazing things people do, I think it’s true that He gave us the gift of creativity. There are so many different ways that people are creative! Paintings, sculptures, delicious food, wood crafts, novels, teacher lesson plans, photography, movies, toys, Powerpoint presentations, Lego creations, decorating, scrapbook pages, technological inventions… the list goes on. One time I took my students to a Welding & Fabrication Expo at Lane Community College, and a student there had made the most beautiful guitar out of metal by welding it in fanciful designs. I had no idea that was possible! They let the high school students try their hand at welding, and I had to tear the kids away from it when the bus came to take us back. One of them made a simple jewelry box. It wasn’t fancy, but he was so proud of it, and I believe he could already see the untapped possibilities of his own future art.

Julia Cameron says “Those who speak in spiritual terms routinely refer to God as the creator but seldom see creator as the literal term for artist. I am suggesting you take the term creator quite literally. You are seeking to forge a creative alliance, artist-to-artist with the Great Creator.” Being creative is something we can do with God!

Many of us have creative dreams. Some of them we’ve made public, some we keep secret, and some are so hidden within us that we don’t even admit them to ourselves. Or if we do admit them to ourselves, we don’t give ourselves permission to work on them. We convince ourselves that the mundane work of everyday life is more important. While it is important, and can even help us unlock our creativity (for example, I write more freely when my house is clean because I’m not distracted by the dirt and clutter), practicing our creativity is just as important. And beneficial to our soul. Why? Because when we practice being creative, we can grow closer to our Creator.

Why do we grow closer to God when we practice being creative? Points 3 and 7 of Cameron’s Basic Principles help us understand this:

3. When we open ourselves to our creativity, we open ourselves to the creator’s creativity within us and our lives.
7. When we open ourselves to exploring our creativity, we open ourselves to God: good orderly direction.

This sounds amazing to me. When we slow down our lives long enough to think about experiencing God more and becoming more like Him, how often do we think of practicing creativity as a way to do that? Of course, if we think the talent is from ourselves because we’re something “special,” we’ll miss the point. Our creativity is a gift from the only all-powerful, most Holy, amazingly creative God. But if we keep this in perspective, we may just experience more of Him when we allow ourselves to explore this gift.

In what ways do you practice creativity? In what ways would you like to practice creativity more? What is your experience of God when you do this?

Genesis 1:27 NIV
So God created mankind in His own image, in the image of God He created them; male and female He created them.

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In His Image | Abba Father

Mollie Havens June 2, 2023

Have you ever lost something so important and so valuable and then found an even better replacement? This happened to me when I was eleven. My parents decided to divorce and I moved away from my father and lived with my mom. During this time I felt so alone and broken. But God found me and showed me that He was my Father. I learned to love and respect Him for who He truly is. I found acceptance and adoration from Him. I turned to Him for approval. I spent all the time I could with Him. I went to church every opportunity I had and learned everything I could about Him. He filled this void in my life, this empty hole. He gave me purpose. He was my passion and I was made alive in Him. He replaced my earthly Father and I found all I needed in Him.

As I grew, my love for Him matured. I dedicated my life to Him and everything I did was for Him. I decided to go from a Christian school to a secular school because I wanted to share my love for Him with people that didn’t know Him. I went on mission trips every summer, joined the worship band and served in the youth group.

Our Father deserves our love and devotion. He poured out His life for us, died a gruesome, painful death, all so we could be a part of His family. It says in John 1 that if we believe and accept Him, then He gives us the right to become children of God and we are reborn. In Galatians 4:6 it describes how “God sent the Spirit of His Son into our hearts prompting us to call out Abba Father.” Abba is an Aramaic intimate term to characterize a personal relationship with God. Abba was a word used by children to call their father daddy or papa. It describes how we are dependent upon Him like little children.

Do you know God as your Father? Are you dependent on Him like a little child? Do you search for ways to serve Him and please Him? Have you grown to love Him and desire to honor Him? God calls us His children. He has adopted us into His family. How can we return the favor?

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In His Image | Who Do You Say That I Am?

Professor Popinjay/Chris Carter May 26, 2023

If a person in Pittsburg proclaims themself a pirate, it’s generally understood that they are a baseball fan. However, should they announce this association while traveling outside Pennsylvania, there’s bound to be someone in the group who wonders why this person pilfers cruise ships on the weekend.

Normally, labeling can be a very helpful way of keeping things organized. Everything in its place and easy to find. It seems a natural habit to want to put people (ourselves included) into organized, easy to define slots. We adopt labels for ourselves. We apply labels to others. But a person is not so easily defined. And definitions are often multitudinous in their variety.

With two middle schoolers in my house, the subject of self-identification has been prevalent both directly and subconsciously. The matter of who they are is at once consuming and confusing. Throughout my life I’ve witnessed people drastically change their style of dress, their musical tastes, and who they hang out with all in an attempt to mark themselves as unique individuals and at the same time associate themselves with something recognizable. For many businesses, a distinguished and eye-catching brand is important to stay relevant in the consumers’ minds. Just as important is whether or not the company’s standards are congruent with the public’s view of that brand. Who we wish to be and how we are viewed by others can be two very different things.

The title of “Christian” has meant many things to different cultures throughout several generations since its inception. Many have donned the title “Christian” with the belief that with it would come an immediate understanding of who they were, what their beliefs were, or perhaps why they might be abstaining from some kind of indulgence. Instead of understanding, however, confusion often prevails as the term “Christian” is incorrectly interpreted and in some cases even incorrectly applied.

Due to the misconduct of some who have called themselves Christian, or even due to propaganda put forth by organizations wishing to hurt the name of Christ for their own ends, onlookers may have a very negative view of what a Christian is and they may assume a person happily calling themselves Christian may also happily embody those negative aspects.

A missionary I was once listening to explained that influential powers in the country to which he was ministering had manipulated the people to associate the term “Christian” with the most vile and unmentionable acts. The missionary went on to explain they do not call themselves Christians in that country because the people are completely opposed to interacting with them. Knowing this, the missionaries instead refer to themselves as “followers of Christ” and with that small change the people are often open to learning that a Christian is not at all what they've been led to believe.

Our differing definitions of labels can also be a two-edged sword. Even as Christians, we can apply labels that sadly may inspire us to write certain people off as “Unsavable” or “Unloveable.” Assigning people into these “convenient” slots can be very damaging to all parties involved.

In the Bible, Saul might have been considered “Unsavable” or “Unlovable” by the early Christians, as he persecuted them in violent and deadly ways. It’s an understatement to say Saul’s view of Christians in his time did not coincide with how they would’ve liked to be regarded. Miraculously, Saul’s perspective changed through direct divine intervention and with that change in perspective came a completely new identity (even a change in name) that would be undeniably evident to all who had once known him as Saul. Here God's intervention drastically redefined everyone's definition of the labels adopted and applied.

Does God regard our titles we have applied to ourselves or others?

Some people with great titles once brought a woman before Jesus. These people had a very accusatory label for her indeed. We don't know what Jesus began to write in the sand but we know all too well what Jesus said to these greatly titled men.

“Let he who is without sin cast the first stone.”

One by one these “prestigious” men walked away from Jesus.

“Where are your accusers?” Jesus asked the woman. “Does no one condemn you?”

“No, my Lord, they have gone.” The woman replied.

“Neither do I condemn you. Go and sin no more.”

Ironically the only person there without sin was not there to throw stones. It might be strange to point this out but even though Jesus rebuked these accusers, he didn't throw stones at them either!

Acts 10:34-35 says “…God shows no partiality.” In the story we see Jesus unaffected by the pharisees’ prestige. He is unaffected by the label they are applying to the woman. He loves all parties involved in this situation regardless of their earthly labels. Instead Jesus was looking at their hearts as it says in 1Samuel 16:7

“…People judge by outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.”

1 Peter 3:3-4 says “Let [your adornment] be the hidden person of the heart, with the incorruptible beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is very precious in the sight of God.”

In Matthew 7:16 Jesus warns the disciples about false prophets saying “...So then, you will know them by their fruits.” Obviously not everyone you meet has titled themselves a prophet but I beg the question: What was the fruit these religious leaders were producing in the accusation of the woman they brought before Jesus? It was certainly not a loving fruit. But when the only person there with the right and authority to not only accuse but judge and condemn, does none of these things but instead forgives and wipes the slate clean, that is a most amazing product of love! He didn't regard the woman as a harlot, as she had been labeled. He saw her heart and gave her a label far greater than the one her accusers had applied.

When God looks at our hearts what is He seeing? Matthew 6:21 says “For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.” What is it you treasure? What fruit do you produce that is seen by those around you? Does that fruit concur with or contradict the misconceptions the world may have about the label you’ve adopted? Likewise, do the labels we apply to others help or inhibit the extension of God’s love through us to people He so values?

Perhaps, when it comes to people, the only truly useful label by which we should define ourselves and others is God’s only label for us. It’s the same label for Saul who persecuted Christians. It’s the same label for the woman thrown at Jesus in disgrace. It’s the same label for the Pharisees who brought her there. It’s the same label for you and everyone you meet:

So Loved.

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In His Image | Who are We? The Roots of Our Identity

John Rice May 19, 2023

I remember a number of years ago when I left my habitual morning quiet time earlier than usual because I had so much to do that day. I walked up to the tractor port to get on the tractor and start some major mowing I needed to get done. I felt bad, and a little guilty, for ditching God so fast…and for something so mundane as mowing! You see, some years prior to that morning I had learned how important it was to spend time with God first thing in the morning. I felt bad about my priorities and also that, having messed up that morning, I would now have to wait until the next morning to do better.

While mowing I suddenly had a revelation! Just because I left my quiet time didn’t mean I had left God or that He had left me. He was with me every bit as much on the tractor as he was with me in the quiet little office chair. Now I know what you’re thinking: that is the most obvious thing you’ve ever heard. And it seems that way to me nowadays too. But I became aware how compartmentalized I was with my spiritual life. God was only present when I asked Him to be present and when I was doing something “religious,” like sitting in a chair with my Bible open? Whaaat? God is THAT stingy with His presence?

Then the words of Michael W. Smith’s song came to mind, “This is the air I breathe, this is the air I breathe, Your holy presence living in me.” Those thoughts took me to Genesis 2:7, “Then the Lord God formed a man from the dust of the ground and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life, and the man became a living being.” So if God breathed life into all mankind, and, last I checked, I was still breathing, He must be continuously breathing His life into me, and that would mean anywhere and everywhere I found myself, He is with me! This opened up a whole new freedom for me. This helped break down the compartmentalization I had lived with all my Christian life.

We read in Deuteronomy 31:8 that God told Moses, “The Lord himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged.”

And then in 1 Corinthians 3:16, “Don’t you know that you yourselves are God’s temple and that God’s Spirit dwells in your midst” – midst meaning in your heart, in your lungs, in your belly, in your gut, in your head, in your feet…in short, all over inside us! We are completely filled with our amazing God.

Doesn’t that make you wonder about us, about our identity? Who are we then? Well, we all know we are not perfect and we are not all-powerful; we didn’t call the Creation into being (If you don’t know this, we might suggest a good psychiatrist for you.) But even in our imperfection and our finite abilities, to know that the Lord God has given us life and breath and lives with us always, must say to us that we are incredibly blessed by the One (who CAN do all things) choosing to live within us, filling us up with every spiritual blessing in Christ (Ephesians 1:3).

In Genesis 1:27 and 31, it reads “God created mankind in His own image, in the image of God he created them; male and female He created them …God saw all that He had made, and it was very good.”

Certainly we all mess up and sin, and we need to look into submitting our unwise behaviors and thoughts to God so they can be transformed into the good things He intended, but how about starting from the awareness of our deepest self, our roots, which are very good and made in God’s image? With that perspective, sin loses its place as our primary concern. Our primary concerns then can be praising this amazingly gracious God who loves us so much as to fill us up with Him!

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In His Image | A New Ideal

Kayla Erickson May 12, 2023

Any other idealists out there? It’s at once both an amazing gift of seeing inspiring possibilities and an uncomfortable burden of realizing just how far that image is from reality. My idealism used to express itself in a sort of perfectionism. I recently went back and read a few journal entries from my young 20-something self, and I saw that perfectionistic worldview coming through full force in my past words. Revulsion and compassion together rose up as I read entry after entry of striving and pleading with the Lord to make the world (or make me) just so. Those words I read evoked a painful emotional state of trying to deal with the impossible gap between the brokenness I saw, and the way things “should be.” And at that time, I thought the perceived gap was the actual gap. Experience hadn’t yet taught me just how limited my own perception could be. I thought that everything that looked broken was broken, and that my painful and uncomfortable feelings were evidence that I needed to take action to change it all. I had a knee-jerk reaction to immediately try to “fix” things that looked askew.

All this came rushing to front of mind last week when I read these words: “But the Father will send the Friend in my name to help you. The Friend is the Holy Spirit. He will teach you all things. He will remind you of everything I have said to you” (John 14:26 NIrV). These are among Jesus’ words to his disciples in the hours before his arrest. I know I’ve read this passage before, and it amazes me every time, but this time I couldn’t get over those words. All things? He will teach us all things? Strangely confusing and reassuring to an idealist.

Later in the same passage, Jesus says more about this: “I will send the Friend to you from the Father. He is the Spirit of truth, who comes out from the Father. When the Friend comes to help you, he will be a witness about me” (John 15:26 NIrV). I wish I could go back and soothe my young self with these words. When I hear them now, I picture a Father who cherishes his beloved children and wants to give them everything they need, up to and including himself, his own Spirit. I picture a tender, honest Spirit who is alive in us, and opens our eyes to the amazing work that God is doing around us which might otherwise be hidden from our understanding. The Friend is not only working in us. The Friend is witnessing, testifying to us, within our very spirit, of the things Christ is doing in the world, and in our brothers and sisters. There’s grace for our imperfections, space to look at ourselves and others honestly in love. The perfectionistic compulsion for me to change things so that they can be acceptable is eased.

Which brings me to something I’ve been learning and relearning (and relearning) since that early time of striving. It’s God’s work, not mine. God will do it. The love we express in our relationships and service can be a powerful testimony of our God, but the redemption is God’s alone. God is at work and holds nothing back; the Father, Son, and Spirit move together in this mysterious dance of redemption and sanctification. The Friend, the Holy Spirit, is real and active, and I can trust the Friend to do sanctifying work in me and in those around me. Sometimes God does things in an order I don’t understand and it can be frustrating or painful. I realize now that I don’t know what the final picture, the “ideal,” really looks like for each person. This is something else that should remain in God’s hands, not mine. So, while I know I will be on this pendulous journey of trying too hard and trying not to try too hard probably until the day I die, I trust the Friend to help me grow. The Friend helps me trust the Father because my spirit glimpses what is hidden from my eyes - blooms of healing and growth and restoration all around me because of the inextinguishable life that God creates and recreates every moment. This promise is not an excuse to stop trying, to step away from the work God is doing through me. Rather it is relief and peace from striving - God takes responsibility for the redemptive work and its outcome. It is a burden too heavy and prideful and spirit-breaking for a human like me.

After Jesus promises the Holy Spirit is coming, he adds these words which seem a fitting conclusion, “I leave my peace with you. I give my peace to you. I do not give it to you as the world does. Do not let your hearts be troubled. And do not be afraid” (John 14:27 NIrV).

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