Ephesians 4 | Living Out Our Deepest Values

In my walk as a Christian and my journey through this life, I’m always looking for direction and reminders for living out my deepest values and allowing them to guide my choices, big and small.

How wonderful that we have the bible to guide us! The second part of Ephesians 4 in the New International Version, is clearly subtitled, “Instructions for Christian Living.” If you’re on a mission to live well as a Christian too, I’d say “look no further;” although the bible is full of these instructions, so do look further! For now, here is what Paul instructs us to do in Ephesians 4:

• Speak truthfully to your neighbor

• In your anger, do not sin

• Do not steal, do honest work

• Have something to share with those in need

• Speak “what is helpful for building others up according to their needs”

• Do not grieve the holy spirit

• Get rid of bitterness, rage and anger

• Be kind and compassionate to one another

• Forgive one another

I feel like when I was young, I was taught to be kind as if it was easy, and for the most part I found that it was. I may have a selective memory, but I don’t remember having any significant conflict of my own. My siblings and I got along well (until the summer we spent playing Nintendo). But as I got older I found myself facing conflicts and feeling angry. Even in my desire to be kind, I found myself hurting others with my words and actions. Being kind suddenly wasn’t so easy. As adults, we are challenged by this world and the instructions Paul gives us become more like instructions for putting together furniture, simple pictures that don’t pan out so well when put into action.

Looking at these instructions as an experienced adult, familiar with many of life's challenges, I notice how these instructions are saying so much more. Three stand out:

1. “In your anger, do not sin.” Paul acknowledges our anger and that we do have it, that it is a reality in this world. I appreciate that recognition so that we can learn to face it with good choices, learning how to respond “in our anger” so that when it bubbles up, we do not sin.

2. Speak “what is helpful for building others up according to their needs.” This is written as, “Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.” Ephesians 4:29.

   What really speaks to me here is that he adds “according to their needs.” I hear Paul telling us to choose our words carefully, recognizing who we are speaking to and how those words will be received, to use words that “benefit those who listen.” This is a wonderful reminder for me when I feel convicted in my truth and want to share “my wisdom” with my children. They may not hear it as I intended if I am not careful to choose words that are “helpful for building others up,” specifically words that will land well with the person I am speaking to.

3. “Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger.” Now this is a project. I also just shared how grateful I am that Paul recognizes that we do have anger, so what does that make us if we feel anger, yet are also instructed to “get rid of all .. anger?” It makes us a work in progress. This may mean we are working through old traumas or simply replacing a sharp reaction with a deep breath and a smile. Either way, the end goal (that we may never reach) keeps us progressing and living out our deepest values, by bringing God’s grace and love to each choice we make, big and small.

In summary, Ephesians 4 reminds me to strive for a pure heart with no bitterness, rage or anger by speaking words that are helpful in building others up, so that in moments of anger I will not sin. This helps me live out my deepest values of contributing kindness, sharing God’s love and encouragement with others, and living with a positive perspective and a deep gratitude to our Lord. And when I stumble, I can remember that I am a work in progress and be kind and encouraging to myself! I hope you will do the same.

---

About the Author

Leona is a wife, mother and traveler who is intrigued by how different people live. Her latest project is exploring ways that different walks of life can simplify, in order to live a fulfilling journey.

Ephesians 4 | The Signet Seal of the Holy Spirit

In biblical times, kings would use hot wax or clay and a signet ring to seal vital items. The seal carried the authority and validity of the king. Anyone who viewed that seal knew the king had authorized the document or was guarding the content within. In the fourth chapter of his letter to the Ephesians, Paul references this imagery.

Ephesians 4:30 (NASB)
Do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, by whom you were sealed for the day of redemption.

This imagery carries many connotations, which we will consider in this blog post.

Holy Spirit is a promise. Signet rings were often used in royal transactions as a promise or a pledge that whatever was contracted would be carried out. In Ephesians 4, Paul indicates that the Lord seals us with his spirit as a promise of what’s to come. The Spirit’s presence and power pledge to us that the day of redemption will come. The blessed day when Christ returns in glory and redeems his people, when we become fully like him, and when his power transforms us fully into his likeness is yet to come, but we have the Holy Spirit and his power to imbue us until that day arrives. (2 Cor. 1:22; Eph. 1:14; Eph. 4:29)

Holy Spirit is an impression and impartation of God himself. At its base value, a king’s seal was an impression left by a ring or a specially made tube on wax or clay. Holy Spirit, who is entirely God, is likewise impressed on every believer; a marking of the power and presence of Christ. The fullness of God comes to dwell within and imparts us with everything we need for life and godliness. We are duly marked and impressed with all our King's markings. And as we allow Holy Spirit to work in our lives, we become more and more an impression of who our King is. (1 John 3:24; Tit. 3:4-7; Eph. 1:13; 2 Pet. 1:3)

Holy Spirit is a witness to whoever encounters us. Those who would encounter the signet seal of a king were witnesses to the authenticity of whatever was marked. The impression was clear and identified with clarity to whom the document belonged. The work of Holy Spirit in our lives, his gifts, his fruit, and ultimately our transformation into God’s likeness is a witness to those we encounter. It is a witness to them of whom we belong to and of the reality of our loving father. This is the very reason God sent his Spirit. The disciples received the gift of Holy Spirit to empower them and set them apart as God’s witness. To empower us to be his witness is still his Spirit’s purpose in our lives today. (Acts 1:8; 1 Cor. 12:7-12; John 15:26-27)

Holy Spirit is a symbol of God’s power and authority. Those who carried their king's seal possessed the full authority of the king. Whatever message they brought, transaction they were representing him in, or promise made under that seal carried the full authority and power of the king to act upon it. Likewise, the King of all Kings has empowered us with his own Spirit and has given us authority over the heavens and the earth. He has empowered us to be his witnesses and walk boldly upon the earth. God has granted us authority over the powers of this world and the strength to resist the devil who seeks to steal, kill, and destroy. He has freed us from the power of death, sin, and our sinful nature and freed us to follow him and his leadership. (Acts 1:8; 2 Cor. 3:16-18; Gal. 5:16-25; 2 Tim 1:7)

Holy Spirit is the ratification of God’s covenant with us. A signet seal was a mark indicating the validity of a treaty or a king's work. The Lord has signified the work he is doing within us by sealing us with the promise of Holy Spirit. His presence in our lives indicates the work the father has begun in us. We can rest in his work as we surrender to his Spirit and allow his fruit to bear in our lives. As we allow the Holy Spirit to confirm the word of the Lord and transform us into the likeness of Jesus, we can rest assured in our hope in Christ and our complete redemption.

---

About the Author

Mike enjoys spending time with his wife and four kids. He loves Jesus, art, music, and poetry. He currently works as the Manager of Learning Technology Solutions for Los Angeles Pacific University and is passionate about adventuring outdoors.

Ephesians 4 | Spirit Filled Thoughts

Ephesians 4 is a calling to live a sanctified life. We are to “live a life worthy of the calling to which you have been called” (Ephesians 4:1), exhibiting godly character, moral courage, personal integrity and mature behavior. In order to have actions and words that represent Christ and his love for humanity, we need to have a thought life that is honorable to Christ. Verse 23 of Ephesians 4 prompts us to continually renew the spirit of our minds and put on the new self that is created in the image of God, thinking of things that are righteous and holy and true, and being thankful to God for all he has done for us.

In Philippians 4:8 it says
“Finally believers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable and worthy of respect, whatever is right and confirmed by God’s word, whatever is pure and wholesome, whatever is lovely and brings peace, whatever is admirable and of good repute; if there is anything worthy of praise, think continually on these things.”

For us to live a life of joy and peace, we must think of things that are true and lovely to God.

My mind is prone to anxiety, doubts and a lack of self confidence. It is easy for me to play the “what if” game in my mind and not trust God with my future. I start to think about worst case scenarios and worry about my finances, health, or relationships. However, God calls me to control my thought life and think about his plan and purposes and peace. So now, when I begin to get anxious I think about the character of God. Psalm 86:15 describes God as a loving, compassionate Father who is slow to anger and is always faithful. This reminds me that even when I do face hardships, God will be there with me to provide comfort and He will never give more than I can handle. To think continually on the things of God, I need to have a healthy prayer life and be in constant communication with Him. Later in Philippians 4, it discusses how not to be anxious about anything, but to pray about everything. It is easy for me to depend on my own strength to get things done. Instead, I should be dependent on the Lord and seek his wisdom and guidance.

In my own power I cannot live a godly life with God-filled thoughts. I am a depraved human that is made new by the power of the Holy spirit, who dwells in me. He is the great counselor and helper who directs my thoughts as I submit to Him. He transforms me into the image of His Son and purifies my mind. He knows my thoughts from afar. We cannot flee from his Spirit. He is the still small voice inside of us prompting us to think how He would think, say what He would say, and do what He would do. So how do we live a sanctified life? We get to know the Spirit better, be in tune with Him, spend time with Him, worship Him, have conversations with Him and be sensitive to where He leads.

Romans 8:5-6 states
“For those who live according to the flesh set their minds on things of the flesh, but those who live according to the spirit set their minds on things of the Spirit. For to set the mind that is set on the flesh is death, but to set their minds on things of the Spirit is life and peace.”

---

About the Author

Mollie is recently married to her wonderful husband Dustin. She is a Wound Care RN at McKenzie Willamette Hospital. She enjoys being creative, getting outdoors and spending time with friends and family.

Ephesians 4 | Grieving the Holy Spirit

Ephesians 4:30 NKJV
And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, by whom you were sealed for the day of redemption.

The idea that God is Three-in-One and One-in-Three will most likely always be a mystery to me …and I’m guessing to many other people as well. It’s a little helpful when I consider how much bigger God is than we humans are and, because of that, He doesn’t easily fit into the logical boxes we construct to try and understand things. To be honest, I’m glad I can’t completely understand God! If I could, I’m not sure He would be such a big God. And even though I know He is much more than a Father, Son and Holy Spirit, these familiar names are helpful to me to get some kind of idea of what He’s like.

Toward the end of Ephesians 4, which speaks mostly about keeping unity in the Body of Christ, Paul makes an interesting command. He says, “Do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God.”

What? The Holy Spirit of God can grieve? How is that possible? And we have the power to grieve the Holy Spirit? Oh no! That sounds like something we should really look into. Surely no one really sets out to grieve the Holy Spirit. But if we can, then apparently sometimes we do, and if that is true, then what does it mean, how do we do it and how can we not do it?

Before looking into this, there are a couple of other commands in the Bible that seem related to how we can affect the Spirit of God: do not quench the Holy Spirit (1Thessalonians 5:19) and do not blaspheme the Holy Spirit (Mark 3:29). So we can grieve, quench and blaspheme the Holy Spirit. I think these are topics we would do well to look into.

To grieve someone means to cause them sorrow. An online definition of the word I found on helpguide.org states, “Grieving is the natural response to loss.” If the Holy Spirit is responding to a loss of some kind, what kind of loss is it? I’m thinking it’s most likely a loss of closeness to us or a rift between us in some way. Could it be that the Holy Spirit loves nothing more than to be close and connected to us? God expresses His love for his creation when He says in Genesis 2, He created light and it was good; He created the earth and all its natural movements and He called it good; He created light and oceans and animals and humans; and He called them all very good. God is love and He loves all His creation.

Throughout the Old and New Testaments we see God’s love at work in various ways: He provides for us, He liberates us, He teaches us, He guides us and He warns us of dangers to us and to those around us. It’s no wonder He is often represented as the good father (though He could also be, and sometimes is, represented as the good mother.) So if God loves us so much, it would make sense that He would grieve over anything that would disrupt our relationship with Him.

In Paul’s letter to the Ephesians, he mentions some of the things that can grieve God’s Spirit: being ignorant of God and having a hard heart, being greedy, impure in thought and deed, lying, allowing our anger to go unchecked, stealing, speaking ungraciously, holding bitterness, squabbling or fighting, slandering, and acting maliciously in any way.

And why does God hate these things? Because in practicing these things we disrupt our relationships with other people…the very people He loves! And in doing so, we injure our own souls as well. This is the opposite of what the Spirit wants for us. So He grieves. But He doesn’t just say to not do these things. He also shows us the ways that please Him: speak the truth in love, build up one another, grow in Jesus, be renewed in your mind, be kind to one another, tender-hearted, forgiving one another. Be imitators of God, live in love. This is our new self, mirroring God’s love back to Him, as well as to others and to ourselves.

I mentioned that the Bible also notes that we can quench the Holy Spirit. In 1Thessalonians 5:14-22, Paul admonishes us to encourage the faint-hearted, help the weak and be patient. He says not to repay evil for evil, but always seek to do good to one another and to all. He exhorts us to rejoice always, to pray without ceasing and to give thanks in all circumstances. Hold fast to what is good. Do not quench the Holy Spirit.

The ideas of quenching and grieving are really very similar, but they offer different images: grieving is to cause sorrow to someone; quenching is a word used when talking about putting out a fire. The Bible often refers to the Holy Spirit as fire. Remember the “tongues of fire” appearing over the disciples at Pentecost in Acts 2? Or the burning bush that spoke to Moses in the desert in Exodus 3? The Spirit is like a fire in our souls, giving us warmth and energy that never burns out. Apparently Paul is wanting to say that, although we can never diminish the Holy Spirit Himself, we can certainly diminish the fire within our souls by making ourselves insensitive to the grace and power of the Spirit that is within us.

It seems to me, the most serious of all admonitions in the Bible is Jesus warning that “anyone who speaks a word against (blasphemes) the Son of Man will be forgiven, but anyone who blasphemes the Holy Spirit will not be forgiven, in this age or in the age to come.” (Matthew 12:32) What can this mean? How very sobering! Commentators have said that the difference between “blaspheming” as mentioned by Jesus in Matthew and “grieving or quenching” as mentioned by Paul, is that Jesus is referring to someone who forever and ever despises the Spirit of God, despises all things good, and set their hearts to do evil constantly. Grieving and quenching are simply the results of our ignorance or weak humanity, but with someone whose true desire is to follow God and be like God, in other words, a person directed by love.

God is love. His love never fails. We are the ones who can distance ourselves from Him and His love by our thoughts, attitudes and behaviors. Thankfully, knowledge of this reality is mentioned in the Bible all the way through by the Prophets, in the Psalms and Proverbs, by the Apostles and by Jesus Himself. Love gives wisdom and knowledge. Love warns. Love forgives when we mess up “seventy times seven times.” And Love gives us the power and strength to live a life that builds up, instead of diminishes, our relationship with our good God. Thank you, Jesus!

---

About the Author

John lives in Pleasant Hill with his dog, Gunnar, and a multitude of guests who enjoy the peace and beauty of the Cascade foothills. With three children and three grandchildren all living in Oregon, he is continually blessed with their company and the good food that always accompanies their get-togethers!

Ephesians 4 | Re-Sensitized by the Spirit

I remember when our kids were little, they were quite sensitive to the background music playing in stores in a way that I was not. There were multiple times where I noticed my one-year-old child bopping to store music while sitting in the grocery cart when I hadn’t even noticed that any music was playing. Over time, I guess my brain learned to filter out the music. Apparently, the playlist on the overhead speakers at Fred Meyer wasn’t nearly as important as other things like which kind of cheese to get or finding the garbanzo bean aisle. But the brain of the child sitting in the cart right in front of me wasn’t doing that kind of filtering. They were noticing and hearing every note played and word sung, and it was causing their whole body to move to the beat.

Just like my brain now has a deadened sensitivity to store background music, we can have our senses deadened to other more important things. This is the reality that Paul describes in Ephesians chapter four. Paul says,

17-19
So I tell you this, and insist on it in the Lord, that you must no longer live as the Gentiles do, in the futility of their thinking. They are darkened in their understanding and separated from the life of God because of the ignorance that is in them due to the hardening of their hearts. Having lost all sensitivity, they have given themselves over to sensuality so as to indulge in every kind of impurity, and they are full of greed.

Here, Paul describes a significant problem that he has observed among the Gentiles. He says that they have lost all sensitivity. Sensitivity to what? If you look at the whole chapter, it becomes clear that what Paul is concerned about is a loss of sensitivity to how one’s actions - words, sexual practices, spending habits, work ethic, etc. - can tear down or build up other people. Paul says that this desensitization, over time, has separated them from the life God intended for them - a life of “good works” (2:10) and “works of service” (4:12). Paul goes on to explain that this desensitization has led to all forms of greed (wanting to take more for oneself at the expense of others), unwholesome talk (words that tear people down), and sexual practices that are impure (focused on one’s own pleasure at the expense of another).

Sidenote: the NIV translates a phrase in v.19 “given themselves over to sensuality,” but that may not be the best translation because it can give the impression that one’s bodily senses are bad and lead us astray, which seems to contradict the “loss of sensitivity” Paul describes in the previous verse. The Greek word there is “aselgeia,” which literally means “self-abandonment” or “a complete lack of self-constraint.”* The idea is that the Gentiles have lost sensitivity to how their actions affect other people (the common good) and have given themselves over to an attitude and way of life where certainly bodily urges are leading the way without boundaries or restraint. Paul’s point is that our bodily senses are good and helpful gifts from God, but when they are put solely in the service of what makes me as an individual feel good in a moment, they will destroy the very things that God intends to build up in my life.

Paul contrasts this way of life with the new kind of living toward which God leads us in Christ. One way we could summarize this new life is a renewed sensitivity to how our actions and decisions are connected to and affect the plight and wellbeing of other people. The Holy Spirit reactivates our senses (senses that God has given us all from the beginning but that have been deadened over time) the way Jesus’ senses were activated – re-tuning our ears to the needs and cries of the people around us.

Think about how many times Jesus stopped and paid attention to people that had become background music for other people. Remember the story when Jesus was walking in a sea of people and suddenly, he stopped and asked, “Who touched me?” His disciples were like, “What are you talking about? Everybody is touching you!” But Jesus, whose senses were not so deadened, knew different. He knew something significant was happening to somebody in the moment and he stopped to find out who it was and address it.

This is the kind of re-sensitizing that the Holy Spirit is ready to do in us if we are open to it! The Holy Spirit inside of us wants to awaken our senses to the reality that we are on this earth to build up others, to encourage others, to care for the needs of others, to lift others up, to be agents of healing and hope, and to love one another honestly and deeply. Paul’s urgent plea to the Ephesians, and to us as the church, is that those who are moved by the Spirit in a new direction with these new sensitivities should take on new actions that are consistent with them.

I’m confident this is the way the Holy Spirit slowly and surely builds a community of love in our midst:

• Individuals become re-sensitized to God’s love through Christ

• They catch a vision of what life could look like if it was governed by Christ’s love

• They learn ways of being, acting and decision making that do and do not correspond to that way of love embodied in Christ

• They begin to align their way of living to this new way of living – the way of love, the way of Christ

The good news is that the Holy Spirit intends for this re-sensitization to happen within community. We need apostles, prophets, pastors, teachers, and evangelists to teach us and show us, in different ways, how our lives are connected to the lives of others so that we truly are prepared and equipped for works of service (4:11-13). Each, in their own way, help us to do this. The apostles among us, like Paul, help us to catch a vision of what could be in the world if we each take the call of Christ seriously. The prophets among us help to uncover individual and systemic injustices that do not truly embody Christ’s love. The pastors and teachers among us come alongside to elucidate, clarify, and demonstrate this new way of love. And the evangelists among us remind us that the community of Christ’s love is intended to be ever-expanding and growing to include more and more people.

During the past two years, I think the Holy Spirit – through the input of many prophets, apostles, evangelists, teachers, and pastors – has been re-sensitizing me to certain needs in our larger community that had become background music. It’s amazing to me that as I’ve become more attuned to certain needs around me God has also helped me to see how I can play a small part in addressing those needs. This is how God works!

---

*Frederic W. Danker, Ed. Greek-English Lexicon of the New Testament and other Early Christian Literature, Third Edition. Chicago: University of Chicago Press, 2001.

---

About the Author

Aaron is a passionate seeker of God and truth, and he enjoys encouraging others in their own pursuits of the same. He especially likes to think about how God is at work in the most ordinary and mundane aspects of our existence. He loves going on adventures to new places with his wife, Heather, and four kids and his perfect day would involve an excellent cup of coffee (or two!), a hike to somewhere beautiful and serene, and some good conversation over a pint at a warm pub. He currently serves as an adjunct instructor at Portland Seminary and a licensed minister in The Foursquare Church.

Ephesians 4 | Automatic Responses

Years ago I was listening to Beth Moore, a women’s bible study teacher and something she said stuck with me. I don’t remember the exact quote, but she said something about praying that her automatic responses would be godly ones. Do you know what I am talking about?

The other day I was driving home and was stopped at a light. I was turning left across traffic, so when the light changed I took a second, literally just one second, to make sure I had an arrow before turning. In that second, the person in the car behind me honked impatiently. Was my automatic response godly? Umm…no.

I managed to hold it together and made no gestures to my impatient fellow driver, but it really chapped my hide and I struggled the rest of the way home, with steam coming out of my ears.

Ephesians 4:32 NKJV says:
And be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God in Christ forgave you.

The Amplified bible puts it this way:
Be kind and helpful to one another, tender-hearted [compassionate, understanding], forgiving one another [readily and freely], just as God in Christ also forgave you.

The Message:
Be gentle with one another, sensitive. Forgive one another as quickly and thoroughly as God in Christ forgave you.

This was just a brief interaction with someone I was never going to see again. It took only a short time to realize that this was a slight offense, to let it go, consciously forgive and move on. But it wasn’t automatic.

There have been times that slight offenses have taken longer for me to let go of.

Then there are the not-so-slight offenses–the repeated offenses, the deep offenses, the ones that threaten my self-esteem, the heart-breaking ones. My automatic response? To defend myself. To justify myself. To at least ponder retaliation. If nothing else, to voice my dismay about my offender.

But honestly, despite all that, I really do want to be a person who forgives, who has grace, who wants healing on both sides of the relationship. It’s just obvious that it doesn’t come naturally and I can’t do it on my own.

A few years ago, during one of our church prayer night gatherings, I had an epiphany! Jesus finally drove it home to me, that it was never intended that I go it alone. That is why Jesus made a way.

John 17: 20-23 NKJV
20 “I do not pray for these alone, but also for those who will believe in Me through their word; 21 that they all may be one, as You, Father, are in Me, and I in You; that they also may be one in Us, that the world may believe that You sent Me. 22 And the glory which You gave Me I have given them, that they may be one just as We are one: 23 I in them, and You in Me; that they may be made perfect in one, and that the world may know that You have sent Me, and have loved them as You have loved Me.

Romans 7:21-25 NKJV
21 I find then a law, that evil is present with me, the one who wills to do good. 22 For I delight in the law of God according to the inward man. 23 But I see another law in my members, warring against the law of my mind, and bringing me into captivity to the law of sin which is in my members. 24 O wretched man that I am! Who will deliver me from this body of death? 25 I thank God—through Jesus Christ our Lord!

In verses 4-6 of Ephesians 4 the word “one” is used 7 times to describe our life in the Spirit, as a church, in God. And how can we be “one” if we can’t forgive each other and leave the judging to God.

Jesus is not unaware of our difficulty in forgiving others, especially when our offense is justified. Can you imagine the number of times Jesus was offended by others walking around on this planet for 33 years? His response was to give His life for them.

A life of forgiveness is a huge ask. But it is essential to God’s plan for our being “one”. For our well-being. And He didn’t leave us to tackle it alone. We have His example, and more importantly we have His Spirit! Jesus lives in me.

I don’t want to be flippant and pretend that it is easy. It’s not. I don’t know if forgiveness will ever become automatic for me in this lifetime, but I do believe it is worth the struggle to be a part of what God has in store for us–for the oneness he promises us. I pray for me and for you that He will give us the grace to always be able to come to a place of forgiveness just as He has forgiven us.

Colossians 1:27 NKJV
To them God willed to make known what are the riches of the glory of this mystery among the Gentiles: which is Christ in you, the hope of glory.

---

About the Author

Darla loves God and is the Digital Media & Communications Director for CitySalt Church. She is a graphic designer and an entrepreneur. Always learning. Eternally grateful for her wonderful and supporting husband Mark and faithful friends who are are pillars of encouragement in all her endeavors.

Mark and Darla have no children but have the privilege of loving a gaggle of ever expanding nieces and nephews.