Joyous Lament | A Look into Joyous Lamenting

It seems to me we humans are practically geniuses when it comes to avoiding pain, sorrow or suffering. Some of us seek out drugs, alcohol, food or sex to avoid our pain and then run the risk of becoming addicted to our “drug of choice”.

But there are so many other, more subtle ways of avoiding pain that may go more easily unnoticed, until something in our lives breaks down and brings it all to our attention or to the attention of our friends and family. One of these things might be working to the point of neglecting everything else, a condition known as “workaholism”. One way might be buying things, a condition we could call “shopping therapy”. Another might be sports and games which we move toward whenever we have free time. And one very common way we try to avoid pain is by denying it altogether! This may be the most subtle of all our tactics. It’s a bit of a mental game we play which can pose as a very spiritual practice. 

We Christians are especially good at this one. When we are hurting, we’ve learned to say “Oh, it’s nothing. I’m fine.” Quickly turning from the suffering or pain, we jump ahead to the declarations, “God is good! I have faith! I’m not really sick or hurt or grieving or lonely or angry, etc.”

It seems to me that while we certainly do want to claim God’s power to heal, His goodness and our faith in Him, we would do well to first acknowledge the truth of the matter and submit to what our bodies and souls are trying to tell us! My wife used to say, “Our bodies never lie.” I think she was so right about that. What is that tightness around our shoulders really about? What is that gnawing sensation in our stomachs really trying to tell us? Why am I sweating when it’s not hot out? Why do I look the other way when I see a troubling scene? The answer is not always obvious and sometimes we might not get an answer until after the fact, but at the very least we can tell God about it!

This is where some of God’s people can help us. The people who wrote the Psalms understood very well the importance of being honest with God. They understood that God was OK with our honesty. Didn’t Jesus say, “The truth will set us free?” I think one of my favorite examples of honesty in the Bible is from the writer of Lamentations 3:19-24:

I remember my affliction and my wandering, the bitterness and the gall. I well remember them and my soul is downcast within me.

Only then does the writer say:

Yet this I call to mind and therefore I have hope: Because of the Lord’s great love we are not consumed, for His compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is Your faithfulness. I say to myself, “The Lord is my portion; therefore I will wait for Him.” 

This is such a good example to me of the importance of being open and honest with God, while still remembering His goodness, love, faithfulness and power to work in our lives. And the result of this is a kind of deep joy and peace. This is why we can call our troubles “joyous lamenting”. 

One practice I’ve been taught for helping me not avoid my negative feelings is called the Welcoming Prayer. It’s simply that when we recognize fear, hurt, grief, anger or any hard or negative feeling, we don’t push it out of our consciousness and seek some kind of salve to dull it. Instead, we acknowledge it and then say “Welcome, grief! Welcome, anger! Welcome, hurt!” We welcome it into our deepest soul, where then God can deal with it and show us how best to deal with it. 

I know this Welcoming Prayer sounds a bit crazy:), but try it! You may just find yourself experiencing the healthy joy of the Lord sooner than you would have thought. The power of the negative feeling is overwhelmed and diminished, but not denied, knowing that God is actively involved… and He knows best how to work in any situation. This opens wide the door for “joyous lament”!

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About the Author

John lives in Pleasant Hill with his dog, Gunnar, and a multitude of guests who enjoy the peace and beauty of the Cascade foothills. With three children and three grandchildren all living in Oregon, he is continually blessed with their company and the good food that always accompanies their get-togethers!

"The One Who Went Down to His House Justified" by Randi Nelson

I was recently sharing a story that Jesus told about a Pharisee and a tax collector at prayer in the temple (Luke 18:9-14). The Pharisee, respected, learned, religiously at the top of the righteousness game, thanked God that he was not a sinner like other men, especially not like the tax collector across the way. The tax collector, on the other hand, “would not even lift up his eyes to heaven, but beat his breast, saying, ‘God, be merciful to me, a sinner!’ I was surprised, as I related the tax collector’s part, to find my eyes stinging and my throat tightening with tears. For a moment, I was in his place, broken, humbled, and seeking mercy from God.

He could have been bitter, wanting nothing to do with God or with that self-sanctified Pharisee and others like him. Rome had dumped this job on him; his neighbors despised him for it. Trapped, he could have become churlish, turning to abuse of his power over collections levies to buy his escape.

Instead, with honesty about his brokenness, he turned to God for mercy. His admission of sinfulness cut to the core; it stripped away all pretense. Why did I start to cry when telling his story? Because I realized that I am he; and I want to be more like him. I want to be more familiar with raw humility and honesty about my sinfulness. I don’t want my right-doing to insulate me from right-being.

Most times, I’m not under as much pressure as this man, so I can start to look and act more like the Pharisee. God forbid that I should become so insulated that I can’t be real with myself and with God. Because, as Jesus says, the one who truly “went down to his house justified” was the one

• who beat his breast in recognition that he was poor in spirit
• who mourned his plight
• who was meek, standing afar and unwilling to lift his eyes
• who hungered and thirsted for righteousness by acknowledging his sinfulness
• whose honesty revealed a purity of heart
•  who was persecuted even for his desire for righteousness

He is the one who was “blessed” (Matthew 5:1-11).

I love this guy. I’m so thankful his story moves me; there’s hope for this crusty heart of mine.

Isaiah 57:15 – For thus says the One who is high and lifted up, who inhabits eternity, whose name is Holy: “I dwell in the high and holy place, and also with him who is of a contrite and lowly spirit, to revive the spirit of the lowly, and to revive the heart of the contrite”.

Psalm 51:6, 17 – Behold, you delight in truth in the inward being, and you teach me wisdom in the secret heart … The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit; a broken and contrite heart, O God, you will not despise.